Sunday, June 22, 2008

Drinking problems... classifications

Consumption of four beers or three wines is now considered binge drinking in Australia. A wag calling the local ABC radio station has said that the other definitions for drinking "problems" is:
Three beers is "fringe drinking".
Drinking until you feel ill is "tinge drinking".
Drinking with a pommy is "whinge drinking".
Drinking so  as you have to hang onto the doors is "hinge drinking".
I guess drinking at the campsite causing you to fall in the fire is "singe drinking".
Pissing off before your shout would be "stinge drinking".
Drinking until you're obnoxious and annoying is "cringe drinking".
Drinking at a lesbian bar would be "minge drinking".

Some new ones:
Splice:
Drinking in alcohol-prohibited parks and public spaces would be "infringe drinking".
Returning from the needle exchange and injecting rum is "syringe drinking".
Drinking to relieve a sore back must be "twinge drinking".
Boy:
Drinking with a kiwi would be "bunge drinking".
Going to Scores with Kevin would be "unhinged drinking".

6 comments:

splice said...

Drinking in alcohol-prohibited parks and public spaces would be “infringe drinking”.

Returning from the needle exchange and injecting rum is “syringe drinking”.

Drinking to relieve a sore back must be “twinge drinking”.

Boy on a bike said...

Drinking with a kiwi would be "bunge" drinking.

Boy on a bike said...

Going to Scores with Kevin would be unhinged drinking.

kae said...

Boy, drunking wuth a kiwi would only be bunge drunking if you hud more thun sux drunks.

kae said...

hmm, maybe thut'd be sex drunks?

The Wizard of WOZ said...

Back in my office work days, we had a standard friday lunch: 3 PINTS of beer and a bowl of wedges. Always made the afternoon seem better.

Now I find out my boss used to condone binge drinking in the workplace, how cool is that?