Only idiots make New Year’s resolutions because everyone knows that noone can keep any resolution they make. I gave up making NYRs in about, oh, 1970 something. That’s when I figured out it was pointless. I had made resolutions which I knew would be really hard to stick to.
In 1988 I resolved to give up smoking. I took it up again on the afternoon of the 1st January 1989. I was stressed. I was with the future husbastard and his family, in Bundaberg. It was hot and humid and it was hard to sleep, the bed was awful, old and saggy, with a board under it which only kept the bed up from my head to just past my hips. Just dreadful trying to sleep there. No flyscreens... yuck. The next day the ex-to-be-but-not-betrothed-yet pitched a fit and threw a tantrum and took off to the beach on his own.
I should have known then that he had issues. (And that’s a whole other story.)
The resolution was to give up smoking. The ex didn’t smoke and I decided that I needed to do something as cigarettes were getting a bit pricey. I tried to go cold turkey on new year’s day, but it didn’t work. What I did was cut back so that I smoked the weakest strength of cigarettes. Then I cut back on the number of cigarettes I smoked, I just limited more where I could smoke. Smoking at work or at home was banned, Telecom had banned smoking on premises and the ex didn’t smoke so in deference to him I didn’t smoke inside at all. Eventually I was able to cut back smoking to about only a few a day and the cigarettes were getting stale before I smoked them. Stirling Menthol when I finished smoking, they were the very lightest for tar and nicotine. Cadging cigarettes from others was not a good idea as they were way too strong for me to smoke.
I cut back the tar and nicotine from the day that I decided to give up, 31 December 1988.
It took me a little longer to completely stop smoking. Twentieth of July 1990. You know that none of my friends noticed that I had given up smoking until about, oh, five to eight years later.
There was one lapse at Christmas 1990. It was a Winfield green. It was so awful I couldn’t smoke it. I was cured. I haven’t had a cigarette since.
That’s the only resolution I made which I kept.
People who make New Year’ Resolutions are idiots. That’s why I don’t make them.
In 2007 I lost 10kg and had another, oh, 25 to go. I’ve since put on fi.. er, a few kilos, I haven’t been sticking to the regime. This year, I resolve to lose weight.